Tuesday, April 28, 2009

A Day's Thoughts

Sometimes I wonder what my husband is thinking about. I'll look over at him during an episode of Biggest Loser or Hell's Kitchen and say, "Honey, what are you thinking about?" He replies, "Ohhhh. Nothing."

And I believe the man.

He's got a job, so that's good. So I know he thinks about work. But here's how I imagine our respective days:

Hubby: Oh man, I gotta pee.

Me: I hope my ovarian cyst is gone. Did we put the garbage cans to the curb last night? I need to email the Clinic about exercising. Do I need to go grocery shopping today? We need to get the mortgage check in the mail.

Hubby: Mmmm, coffee. [scratch, scratch]

Me: The dogs are almost out of food, I'll need to pick some up. Oops, milk too. What should we have for dinner tonight? [take dogs out to potty, pick up potty]. I have lunch tomorrow with L and my follow up U/S next Monday. I did book the appointment, right? Remember to ask for detailed receipt this time. Did our tax refund come yet?

8:30 am
Hubby: I wish my computer would boot up faster (he works in a home office). What music should I listen to today?

Me: Time for Lupron. When do I get to halve the dose? How many more days till Delestrogen? I need to look at the online PDR stuff about the Delestrogen. The news says swine flu may become pandemic....should we drive to the Clinic for our transfer rather than fly (500 miles)?

12:00 pm
Hubby: "What's for lunch?"

Me: I need to review those state job postings. Am I going to run out of Lupron? I should do the math and see how many doses are in that vial in case I need to reorder. Ugh, my roses are covered in aphids, remember to buy bug spray. Do we qualify for any of the federal TARP benefits?

5:30 pm
Hubby: "I'm off to the gym."

Me: Figure out dinner. Cook it. Clean up. Gotta remember to call back friend who left message 3 days ago. Did I get the dogs out for a walk today? Can we afford the cost of switching to an all organic diet? Crap, I forgot to get to the post office today.

8:00 pm
Hubby: "What's on TV tonight? Mind if I have a beer?"

Me: I wonder if using my laptop on my lap can cause cancer? Whose birthday is coming up that I need to buy cards for? Should I stop coloring my hair because of the toxins? We're almost out of paper towels. I wonder if our FET transfer date will be delayed. What if we get pregnant with triplets...how will we manage in this tiny house? What if we don't get pregnant?

11:00 pm
Hubby: ZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Me: I hope my ovarian cyst is gone. What do I need to do tomorrow?


tireegal68 said...

That's hilarious!
Does he know that is how the conversation goes?!

just me said...

i think i am married to your husbands brother :) some days i wish that i was a man....but i always come to my senses!

IVF 40+ said...

Ha ha ha ditto! that is so funny. And so familiar. So so familiar.

stillhopeful said...

Hysterical. And so true! It's like you're writing about me and my husband!!! Why is it that us women have to be the ones to think about and plan EVERYTHING?? If you think about it, we really have no choice but to nag, right?